Just decided to start a new blog. It's such a hassle to keep updating them daily, so I made this one, to update whenever the fuck I want to. yes.
Everything is just all over the place, I'll be more than surprised if I don't end up in unit nine before this is all over. Family is just getting to me, basically to the point that I can't even do school work. I need to get out, I need to spend time with friends to get my mind of of this all. I have two projects due on monday, I haven't gone to school the past two days. Everything seems like it's just getting worse. Custody battles, the worst thing on the face of the planet, even worse, I have no say in ANY of it. It's horrible. I don't want to live with my mother. This is all over my mom not wanting to pay child support, it's so gay x7. She doesn't want to pay, so she wants me to live with her so Dad will have to pay. If it's the last thing on the face of the planet I do before I die, I will not live with that woman. She puts me through hell and back outside of work and I don't want to deal with that shit on a daily basis. To make things even better, the guy I babysit for calls me a day before he wants me to babysit, when I already have plans and wants me to babysit the next night, and then gets all pissed off at me for not being able to do it. Sorry Senor, I didn't sign any papers saying I HAD to babysit the day after you call me. Tough loss. Every small thing seems to be irritating me. I don't have that bad feeling anymore, ever since the whole ouija board thing, weird.
Friends seem to be turning against me, not liking me for who I am. I'm trying not to let that get to me, but it's just there and I can't make it go away. I don't want to have to change for someone, and I don't want to be called out on all the little things I do that one person doesn't like. I could point out a hundred and one things I don't like about this one person, but I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to be just like that one person. Accept people for who they are, don't pick out things you don't like about them and then call them out on it. It's such bullshit.
Among the family issues, friend issues, being really stressed out all the time and wanting to jump off of a bridge. My internal organs feel like they're exploding again. I'm not really on speaking terms with my parents, especially not about things that involve me, I seem to be causing a lot of the problems. "If you weren't born, maybe we wouldn't have these problems all the time" thanks a lot. I'm just going to keep the bursting of internal organs from my parents. I'm sitting here writing all of this because I don't want to complain to my friends, or anyone else for that matter about it. There's probably not going to be anyone who reads this, or this blog for that matter. But that's okay, I get to rant about things that only I care about.
Money, it seems to be another issue, I haven't eaten in a few days, and I'm not going to be doing that anytime soon. I need to get my wisdom teeth removed, and I need to get braces, that's all happening soon. I'm not looking forward to it. And that's partly what's causing this stuff between my parents. It's always money. Money is the most fucking retarded thing on the face of the planet, I think.
Ben Kweller is doing a fantastic job of keeping me sane, for now. I forgot how much I loved his music until last night when I came across him when I was lurking the Youtube world. For some reason, though, his new album "Changing Horses" sounds like a country album, but still good nonetheless. I thank you dearly Ben Kweller, for being the keeper of the sanity, for now.
Okay, time to stop being a whiney emo kid, for the time being.
